Tweet “Interview My Sweaty Pits” Eleven years ago, I was twenty-nine, and I had recently left my job teaching composition at the University of Colorado in Colorado Springs (after three years there, my annual salary had skyrocketed to all of … Continue reading
Tweet “Good Vibrations” As a teacher of writing, I caution my students against using cliches in their writing. Cliches are hackneyed and trite and require no thought on the part of the writer. For example, I point out to my … Continue reading
Tweet “Poop Across the Genders” I just couldn’t get a good photo here of what I want to show you. What you need to know is that this is a page from one of Girl’s “fast word” books from the … Continue reading
Tweet “Family Expansion” When Groom and I met, started the love groove, and launched into the Plan Making phase of our relationship, we had the whole “So, uh, you want kids or what?” talk. Since I knew I wanted have … Continue reading
Tweet “Mel Torme Is Merely A Velvet Fog Compared to Me” Move over, Bob Barker. Step aside, Tony Bennett. Outta my way, Bill Clinton. Get another job, Oprah. There’s a new Schmoozer in the business, and her name is Jaw … Continue reading
Tweet “If a Tree Falls in the Backyard, Does It Make a Sound If Only the Mail Carrier Is There to Hear It?” Now, first off, I’m not complainin’. But the skies around here have been pretty unstable lately, with … Continue reading
Tweet Photo: Groom strums a plaintive ballad on a balalaika my mom purchased in Russia in 1961; the ditty is entitled “I’ve Been Hauling Other People’s Boxes in 103 Degree Heat for Days, and It Sucks”“Hummels for Sale” Holy crap. … Continue reading
Tweet “Bizarro Profession” I am a bibliophile who wants to throttle most librarians. This, of course, keeps me in a constant and heightened state of conflict, as I rely heavily on libraries and read several books a week. I … Continue reading
Tweet“Honey, I Can Tell Something’s Bugging You”In college, I had a friend who was gifted nostrilly. I mean, he had some seriously large nostrils. Some nights, to wow The Crowd at dinner, he would take a quarter and stick it … Continue reading