Just Sayin’

34 Responses

  1. lime says:

    you know, one of my new readers recently told me there is a fine line between madness and genius. i do believe this post dances on that line ever so blithely as you provide yourself satirical literary therapy which nudges you gently into genius even as you pirouette over the madness.

    only a real lit geek (and a psychic sister of mine) would bring herself sanity by skewering a drunk in a spoof of WCW.

    This is just to say (by isaac, son of lime)

    I have taken the 12 dollar check you gave me for the book fair
    and given it to the cafeteria ladies instead, even though i told you i threw it away because i was mistaken about the book fair date.

    forgive me.
    your peanut butter sandwiches were so dry.
    the calzones on fridays were so greasy and full of cheesy delight.

    yes, this is a true story that only came to light when we balanced the checkbook this week and there was $12 unaccounted for….

  2. lime says:

    and i am sorry about having to endure this besotted student. does he fancy himself some sort of raymond carver or something?

    hang in there.

  3. flutter says:

    I love you. It is absurd how much

  4. lime says:

    hopes the 7 week case of the skitters has not led to a serious shortage of soft, absorbent, disposable paper products in the greater duluth area….snarls and grabs a napkin, or a tissue, or the last roll of TP from the unrepentant WCW and RC wannabe and dabs jocelyn’s eyes tenderly. you’re welcome.

    mountainlime(at)gmail(dot)com tuck it away safely. let me know if you want to find a way to drive him mad in a house of usher sort of way.

  5. Her Grace says:

    I’m with flutter.

  6. david mcmahon says:

    Enjoyed the image. Enjoyed the concept. Enjoyed the post.

    And, I have to confess ….

    I enjoyed the plums!!!

  7. oreneta says:

    I must say that it is one of my favourite poems….it is quite ambiguous at the end there, but I could forgive him because he enjoyed them so much. Probably. I would forgive him for the poem…fair trade.

  8. SQT says:

    I love your genius in providing a backstory for the beleaguered wife. I’m sure that story is true.

    And you are a mad genius.

  9. AmyTree says:

    Wonderful.

    Now I want plums…

  10. Glamourpuss says:

    1. I have The Red Wheelbarrow on my desk, and when things get too much, I take comfort in its simplicity and the fact that my boss just doesn’t get it.

    2. Parodies are wonderful.

    3. A few weeks back, I remarked to a friend that one of the things abotu teaching is that unlike other professions where the type of people you encounter are self-selecting, in teaching, you are exposed to the whole spectrum of humanity and regardless of how you feel about them, you gotta teach the little shits.

    I feel your pain.

    Puss

  11. Jazz says:

    How do I love thee,
    Let me count the ways…

  12. Moi says:

    I’m sorry
    I will now be
    your blog stalker

    But you are so good
    at making me think

    Forgive me
    for loving you
    Your words
    amaze me

  13. Say It says:

    wonderful wonderful wonderful. I’m with flutter too.

  14. Chantal says:

    This is my attempt:

    I read blogs
    when I should
    be working.

    You probably don’t
    pay me to
    chat with online
    friends.

    Forgive me
    they are much more
    interesting
    than you are.

  15. Claudia says:

    Oh honey, you are a modern miracle, do you know that? How I worship you. I am NOT worthy.

  16. Optimist says:

    Brilliant!

  17. Tai says:

    That’s brilliant! And you know, I never looked at that poem in that light before.
    I feel quite educated. Thanks!

  18. liv says:

    OMFG. This is my biggest and bestest compliment: Your blog is the blog that my blog wants to be when she grows up.

    ps–i ate one of your dead squirrels.

  19. pistols at dawn says:

    I’ve always hated this poem and this poet for being unjustly famous, but I liked your version. And not just because it was about my people – those too lazy to follow through on their alcoholism.

  20. Steve says:

    Do you know you’re my hero?

    I’m sorry to have left you
    the arduous task of
    submitting English Student of the Year while
    simultaneously giving her a much needed and deserved pat

    It’s just that nap time was calling
    and there are only three weeks left in this
    whip-thin sabbatical

  21. Anonymous says:

    I think that Stevo should be punished for writing on his sabbatical. As if summer doesn’t follow sabbatical in Minnesota, or Texas, where ever he’s biking. Blighter.

    Sorry I left you
    with the sympathetic dean,
    vice president, and crazy people.

    But life in California is
    good.

    iJim

  22. heartinsanfrancisco says:

    I have known many “writers” who emulated Dylan Thomas by going straight for the alcoholism while bypassing even the attempt to write.

    The martinis were cold
    and so were the corpses
    in due time
    or before.

  23. Minnesota Matron says:

    The Matron herself here, visiting. Indeed, I heard the same public radio show. Omar is your alcoholic lying student’s twin separated at birth.

    But when I heard the radio show I thought of another alcoholic, a fated but dear friend who has nothing at age 54. He asked me for $40 for food (this after many other small money gifts) and I said, okey dokey. Then, a kid got sick and I called and left a message saying that I’d have to come the next day and he was FURIOUS.

    “I need that money now!!”

    Sigh.

  24. cathy says:

    I have gained
    12 pounds
    since the day
    we were married.

    I have
    no siliconed breasts
    or liposuctioned thighs
    to incite your ardour

    Forgive me
    for becoming
    the mother of your children
    Instead of
    one of those porn queens
    you so admire.

    Ah that felt good, thanks jocelyn
    You are brilliant.

  25. seventh sister says:

    to quote another great poet:

    ‘It’s about forgiveness
    about forgiveness
    Even if ,even if
    You don’t love me any more’

    but of course, I loved this post.

  26. Mother Theresa says:

    Brilliant as usual! I have a cold and am not feeling at all witty, but I’m not too sick to have enjoyed this post thoroughly. Maybe your student will die of dehydration after the diarrhea and finally leave you alone. 😉

  27. Pendullum says:

    Poetry sometimes brings us back to ourselves…
    I loved it…

  28. citizen of the world says:

    I’m so impressed by how much work you put into this!

    Yeah, though, it does seem likea pretty flimsy non-apologetic apology.

  29. Anette says:

    This is very good!
    Your blog is the highlight of my “blog tour” every time!
    I love the photo!

  30. geewits says:

    I like those take-offs of the poem. Maybe bad student should e-mail this excuse:
    It was a dark and stormy night,the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness. That’s why I was unable to attend class.

  31. HeatherAnn Fragglehead says:

    Absolutely wonderful. The behind-the-scenes story to go along with the poem. And all of those other poems.

    I also love ‘This American Life’. I might very well be in love with Ira Glass.

  32. urban-urchin says:

    hahahahahahahaha…

    I love that poem (both the org. and your take on it.)

  33. mrs. tioli says:

    This is if I would bother to say

    I haven’t done a chore
    even when you had to ask
    for a week
    one day in teen years

    and which you probably
    had to do yourself
    once or twice

    Forgive me
    my life is more important than yours
    so busy
    and full of my space

  34. August says:

    Jocelyn, you’ve truly outdone yourself here. My head is spinning.

    You’re so wonderfully draining. I need a drink.

    August

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