Rolling Down the Adventure to My Early Retirement

29 Responses

  1. flutter says:

    might I please scan the reports of UFO sightings over your area to see if there has been anything in relation to her enormous ego?

    That is not a case of your crochetiness, it is a case of her being a rag.

  2. lime says:

    perhaps krusty has moved from having a duff beer or two in the evening to hitting the hard stuff heavily. perhaps someone put s**t in her rubber nose. perhaps her suspenders chafe. perhaps it’s a case of clown rage at not being taken seriously lo these many generations. it’s nothing a seltzer enema shouldn’t take care of.

    what a nutjob.

  3. Hammer says:

    Seems the evil clown forgot their meds.

  4. Claudia says:

    Oh, see now I want to know just exactly how much clown experience you have had.

    PS – Krusty needs to get laid. The End.

  5. Maddy says:

    Yeah for the old guy with the broken bike!

    The student – she’s on holiday that’s why she’s not replied.

    With any luck she’s gone to England – that’ll wipe the smile off her face.


  6. Her Grace says:

    I was just thinking to myself the other day, “That Jocelyn, she sure is one rude woman. And she knows absolutely NOTHING about being a clown.”

  7. Claire says:

    See, your first mistake was being nice to the little twit. Second mistake was responding in a lengthy reply because that made her think she might be right about something so completely stupid. So she’s going to continue being a pain in the ass for the rest of her life and it’s all your fault!
    (just kidding)

  8. Princess Pointful says:

    The unicycle was the perfect end touch.

    Seriously, though, now I know where my double chin has come from. Even my meagre TA experience, with its associated
    “did i miss anything today get back to me ASAP” emails at midnight must have added a few wrinkles on.

  9. Jazz says:

    My brother is a teacher.
    A friend is a teacher.
    You are a teacher.

    And I think y’all must be saints, because what you put up with would make me go postal.


    Yeah, I’m old now too.

  10. AmyTree says:

    I love love LOVE the willfully patient and polite responses you gave to her particular brand of kerrazy. That’s all that can be done with some people – I like to think of it as passive agressive kindness and I find myself doing it alllll the time (working as I do with a lot of self-obsessed creative-types). Idiotic ingrate.

    Wishing Groom good luck with the unicycle! New hobbies are always amusing (particularly ones with a danger of hilarious mishaps…)

  11. heartinsanfrancisco says:

    Ah, Sweet Angst of Youth!

    I especially liked the progression toward violence of your email addresses, followed by offering Krusty hugs.

    Can you post the link to the publication? I would love to read her “profile.”

  12. steppingoverthejunk says:

    wow. you’re nothing like my professors! heh heh. krusty. i know some krusties.

  13. heartinsanfrancisco says:

    Oh, and shouldn’t her name be spelled “Krusti” with an “i?”

  14. Amy says:

    Ahhh, the joys. I once got an email from a fellow student who wanted to convey to me that even though she felt the strong and ill-advised desire to write about her genitalia (in iambic pentameter)–which often caused in me the strong urge to vomit at the task of group edits–she was NOT to be trifled with as a SERIOUS WRITER and just because I was SO MUCH OLDER than her didn’t mean I knew more than her because, she’d like me to know, many people tell her she has an old soul and is likely God’s vagina, reincarnated.

    Oh, and her email was something like: goddess(name of girl who will remain anonymous)ATbananasluguniversityDOTedu

    NEVER trust a person who puts “goddess” in front of their name. Ever.

    P.S. I am now on dial up, even though I’m not commenting, I’m still stalking.

  15. veits says:

    Yipes…but can you imagine what it is like in my world? 7th graders! (Luckily, most of them don’t know my email address!)

    Loving you from Montana!

  16. Shelley says:

    Boy, technology gives kids balls, no? Back in he olden days, you know, when I was in college, we didn’t have this whole email/Internet thing. We had to register by standing in line for hours and hours. I remember a lot of standing in line. If we wanted to talk to a professor, we had to actually go to his/her office, during “office hours.”

    I’m sorry, I’m old and tend to go off subject. Point is, email somehow allows people to say things that they would never, ever say in person. Lovely girl, that Krusty. This is the entitlement generation, and wow, it’s ALL about them.

    I’m going back to my rocker on the porch now, and yell at some kids to get off my lawn.

  17. Pam says:

    As a teacher I know that in 2008, Krusty can appear on the roll as Crusti, Kr’sti, Crusty, Krustay,Kerustai, Crusti-Lee ,til you think, is no-one called Jill anymore?Small joke. Know you made the name up to go with the post, but I’m just saying as a relieving teacher the looks of disgust and comments I get at a mispronounced name would rival any email annimosity you (you poor thing) have suffered at a missed colon or sentence twiddle.I am still beside myself with laughter at Gorm on the unicycle – you go, you good thing, go!!

  18. Pam says:

    …er make that Groom. Jeez, I really do have a problem with names…

  19. citizen of the world says:

    “You are a very rude woman.” I nearly spit out my coffee on this one! You couldn’t have made up that exchange if you’d tried. Hysterical. Nope, nothing to do with your age, she’s just got an enormous chip on her shouder. I had her twin in a class I taught a few years ago who was so in-my-face belligerant that I was rendered nearly speechless. Nearly. I was fortunate that she was also unable to finish anything on time or show up for exams, so I was able to fail her. Ha!!

  20. Diana says:


    Send her a present of foil-wrapped candy kisses made of Ex-Lax and Ben-Gay dipped Tootsie Pops.

    Kids, these days. No sense of gratitude and no sense of humor.

  21. geewits says:

    Man, the nerve, the gall, the chutzpah of people these days. That whole empowerment self-esteem thing of the 90’s lead to our society becoming a whole sack of entitlement assholes. I’m truly sorry you have to deal with that. We are going to be paid back in spades for forcing self-esteem on our kids.

  22. Jazz says:

    Maybe an award will make you feel younger? There’s one at my blog awating you

  23. steve says:

    Yer gonna make me go the the blog now! I think I know Krusty from the Simpsons, right? How lucky Groom has the unicycle to distract you.

  24. rak says:

    I’m so happy that you closed the series of emails with “hugs”…I do believe she needed that 🙂

    They will never allow Groom into the circus if he insists on wearing a helmet.

  25. Dory says:

    boop boop boop
    Boop Boop Boop

    WHACKNUT alert.

  26. Glamourpuss says:

    Jesus H Christ. Does that ignorant girl not know what a salutation and complimentary close are?

    You’re a better woman than I, Jocelyn. I’d have stuck a flea in her ear for addressing me so. Rude, rude, rude. When did we teach the younger generation that they are not our equals – I blame the parents….

    And now I’m off to mutter into my cocoa.


  27. mrs. tioli says:

    Well, I for one can see her point. A profile is sideways and in an interview you’re facing someone. Big difference there. It would be rude to look straight at someone when you want a profile.

    Wait, we’re talking about writing?

  28. pistols at dawn says:

    Here’s the problem: your school should stop forcing kids to take “How to be an Ungrateful Whippersnapper” during their freshman year. They need to slow down and appreciate the taste of butterscotch.

  29. Say It says:

    I am past retirement age in terms of disdain for todays spoiled rotten brats and my kids haven’t even reached the college years.

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