The Smell of Success…or Perhaps an Abundance of Broccoli

27 Responses

  1. sweffing says:

    Gosh I’m impressed, thirty pounds as near as dammit. Is this purely healthy eating, not eating at all, or huge amounts of exercise? Good luck for next week’s weigh in.

  2. Logo™ says:

    Girl, if you’d done the enema you TOTALLY would have made it!!
    That is some impressive weight loss, wtg you.

    Also, I too have always found that churches are a great place to find crazies, be made crazy, and inflict my own craziness on others.

  3. Congrats on the 30 pounds. So jealous. I’ve been paying for online Weight Watchers for a year. Can’t remember my password. I will have to attend the group. When I did that years ago, I lost 28 pounds. I do remember the anxiety involved with weigh in. How I’d always wait for my morning daily before I went to class.

    Perhaps when I get it together better – back to blogging and other things, I’ll be better about my health.

  4. Did you try washing away sin? I could drop a half pound just from the waist up.

  5. MichiganME says:

    30 pounds!!! WooHoo, that’s inspirational! What a great post—so true, especially loved this line…”However, that evening as I climbed the stairs, making my exodus from The Lord’s Big Rec Room, a place where women come to wash dishes while men recover, cookies in hand, from the taxing effort of washing away sin,…”

  6. Choochoo says:

    Congrats! Have you been secretly bouncing around in front of aerobics vids?

  7. Rather than litter your blog with tons of stalker-y comments let me just say I have hooted, sniffled, and loved my way through your past few weeks’ entries, each one as well-written, charming, funny, and full of the kind of frank talk and forgiveness of our own human frailties (in the end) as the others. Thank you.

  8. Meg says:

    I am thoroughly impressed. Mostly at the 30 pound weight loss, but also with your tenacity in attending WW meetings. I just can’t stick it out. I, too, am an expert at strategically planned weigh-ins. It’s practically OCD with me. Only first thing in the morning, naked, after “elimination”, before even a sip of water. Any upward deviation can usually be explained by violation of one of these cardinal rules or, alas, something “salty” the previous evening; or perhaps the scale is off balance because it is sitting funny on the bathrom tile floor; or I haven’t shaved my legs in a while.

  9. lime says:

    30 lbs. man, if i didn’t love you so much i’d hate you a little for that. i think i found all you lost. damn shame it didn’t stay in between the couch cushions. but 30 lbs, congrats, really.

    and may i echo an amen in response to logo’s comment about church=crazy of all varieties.

  10. chlost says:

    I am raising my fist in celebration of your 30 pound loss. Yes! 30. That .2 means nothing!
    I am also so greatly impressed that you are doing this. I wish you lived near me and I could go with you to the meetings. I think we would get along well,and we could be each other’s enema buddies.
    A toot in the face beats a stick in the eye…..as my father would have said.

  11. Lil says:

    Wow. 30 pounds. As far as I’m concerned the 2/10ths doesn’t even count. I’m impressed as all get out. Now if only there was a brilliant way to do that from the couch.

  12. Friko says:

    congratulations on being nearly there and commiseration on being not quite (all) there.
    Those gusto-tory pleasures (I’m sure all the people who read your blog got it without explanation) are just too enticing, I know the hardship they cause at this time of year. I too am suffering, albeit in the privacy of my own bathroom. I never step on the scales unless I’ve peed first. And just before I step under the shower which means naked. And still the damn scales don’t work.

    I actually did a bit of a whine myself about the extra winter poundage. I will NEVER wear sweatpants, if it kills me; and I will NEVER expose my shame in public. I have, however, taken to wearing ‘reducing’ knickers, which at least distribute the bulges evenly between what was once a trim waist and my upper thighs.

    I am too old to start running and indulging in violent exercise; but if you hear of somebody collapsing into the dirt clutching a trowel, that’ll be me.

  13. .2 has to be well within the standard error of measurement, so Yay! on the 30 pounds! I will dedicate the beer next to me to your accomplishment.

  14. You will make 30 next week for sure. I had hit 35, but I’m at 30 now–though I quit going to meetings a while ago.

    I had a different philosophy on the weigh-in–I wore the same outfit each week, but the same weight clothing (yoga pants, camisole, light hoodie) and full jewelry (watch, two bracelets, two rings and my earrings–and one bracelet is fairly heavy), so that if I ever really needed that 1/2 a pound I could get it no problem.

    Congrats on the hard work paying off!

  15. Deborah says:

    You are to be commended for 29.8 and so what if it takes an extra week to get there? I realize that you’d like to have WW in your rear-view mirror as soon as possible, but given the grist it gives you for the blog mill, I wouldn’t be too quick to say goodbye. Wigh-ins sound a lot like trying to ‘make weight’ for wrestlers. My daughter was just on the edge of a higher weight class when she wrestled and used to go through some horrendous machinations to drop a half-kilo, which I had some considerable trouble accepting. Visions of bulimia filled my head.
    On the way from Frankfurt on my last plane ride, my seatmate let rip a silent-but-deadly and then followed that up with a very audible belch encore. He was otherwise a considerate passenger but possibly perplexed as to why I would not communicate with him beyond the bare minimum.
    Being one of those hateful people who never had to think about weight, I am nevertheless arriving at a point where I can sympathize with you. Menopause is the ultimate leveller and I will never again think that losing even a few pounds is easy. Being as active as you are is your best ally, but what’s with being hungry all the time?? I can understand just wanting to eat for the sake of having wonderful stuff to chew, but surely feeling like you’re starving is not right?

    As always, I enjoyed the asides (‘once you make that friend, you keep her for life!’) and am pretty sure that part of what Byron loves about you is your funny bone.

  16. kmkat says:

    30 pounds?!!

    ::sigh::

    Good for you! My favorite line was about the highly processed “healthy” foods, $6 for 4 protein bars. Ever since H.J. Heinz (I think) bought WW, I have been skeptical of their products. Real food for real weight loss, that’s my motto. (“So how’s that workin’ for ya, Kat?” “Um, well… look, a bird!”)

  17. My belly hurts from laughing. And I keep replaying that scene from Bridesmaids where Megan says, “I want to apologize. I’m not even confident on which end that came out of.”
    Now, down to brass tacks. I used to date a wrestler who would spit into a cup all day and wear a sauna suit to make weight.
    I love you for your brain and your humor, though your body is probably FINE.

  18. Robin Preble says:

    I always love a good fart post. Nicely done.

  19. Kathryn says:

    I didn’t think you had 30 pounds to lose, so if you did then congrats on losing them. I’ve found them and am saving them for you.
    Now, to the important stuff. A fart in the face. What were you even thinking, letting your face follow so close to someone’s bum up the stairs? You have to admit, you’re at least 50% to blame in this situation. You like to play with fire? Well sometimes you get burned!
    Safety: First rule of stair-climbing with a crowd: maintain 18″ face-to-bum distance at all times.
    Etiquette: Expel all personal gasses before climb commences. Do squats if you have to. If you feel the urge to pass wind while climbing, quickly turn and face down the stairs (pretend to look for your friend Hortense, if necessary) releasing the gas toward the calves of the climbers ahead of you. Muffle the sound of gas expulsion with rapid hand clapping and mouth-raspberrying for the full duration of the expulsion. Pause on the stairs, still facing backwards until all gas has risen to above the tallest head level (approx 40 seconds). Extend and release rear waistband of your pants in order to facilitate rapid clear-out of fabric-clinging residues. When noise and gas are all safely finished, resume stair climb.
    All of this is pure common sense, but obviously you and your fellow pound shuckers missed this lesson somewhere along the line. Feel free to print and post this comment in a prominent place at your WW meeting place. Lives will be saved!

  20. Julie Ryan says:

    Joce, you crack me up. I’ve always thought of a fart as tiny molecules of poop floating about. In the face – ouch.

    What’s cool about WW is that even though you may have little in common with the others in the room, the social pressure of being accountable to other real people becomes a motivating factor. We hear their voices telling some story as we consider our next food move. Congrats — think how good it will feel when spring comes to Duluth!

  21. Pearl says:

    🙂

    There must be a WW’s badge — or perhaps beads? — that you should receive and sew to an article of clothing after being farted at.

    Smiling and shaking my head,

    Pearl

  22. Well, there you have it, that woman’s flabby woof-woof is proof that global warming exists! No matter how much weight you lose, you have to keep going to those meetings. That’s pure blog fodder gold!

  23. Hey, out of context, but did you see the Northern LIghts tonight? Just saw a clip of them visible in Duluth tonight, due to the solar storm. So hoping you were outside. I recall seeing them one night while visiting my folks in Green Bay. Most incredible thing I’ve ever seen.

  24. Friko says:

    Hi, I hope you still get thin?

    What is “jonesing” for something?

    • Friko says:

      this, this, this! Nothing to do with this post, just a typo!

    • Jocelyn says:

      Yes, I am still working at getting thin (currently -33.6 lbs down); thanks for checking in!

      “Jonesing” is a phrase that, I believe, first came out of drug culture (specifically heroin) in the 1960s/70s (I’m kind of making this up, but I think that’s its origin). When someone needed a “fix,” he or she would be “jonesing” for the drug. Nowadays, it is often used to mean a feeling of deep, pulsing need.

  25. Hilary says:

    You’re a hoot.. not to be confused with “toot”.. we have Bubbles for that.

    Congrats on reaching (just about) 30 pounds of weight loss. That’s not an easy accomplishment. I know because that’s about what I need to drop. Good for you. 🙂

    Thanks for your recent visit to my blog. Always nice to see a new face.

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