Species: Dinkus Dorkus

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So have you ever thought to yourself, “Well, now, Martha, hasn’t it been an age since we’ve had a nice photo with the kids? And looksie-looksie: we seem to be at that rare moment in time when everyone is clothed and within yodeling distance of a bath! Yes, let’s do.”

Clapping your hands together brightly, you line up the troops, warn them sternly that we actually want a nice photo this time–no “Look how Niblet smeared his quesadilla all over his torso; isn’t that precious?” pictures today. No, this will be one we can show the great-grandparents next time we brave the 85 degree indoor temperatures and go visit them in The Home.

So everyone’s really trying here.

But pretty quickly,


you realize it ain’t gonna happen. The vibe is off. Clearly, everyone had way too big a bowl of Slack Muscle Flakes for breakfast.


No matter how much you try to look like regglar folk, attempt after attempt,


everyone seems to be embracing his/her Inner Eejit. We try to look natural, but somehow we continue to look just as creepily “wrong” as Priscilla Presley’s post-op face.

So whaddya going to do?


For us, it was back to normal. Dropping all pretense, we ditched the clothes and laid off the bathing.

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27 responses to “Species: Dinkus Dorkus”

  1. liv Avatar
    liv

    awww!!! i’d totally show you guys off at The Home.

    i’ll have to email you the endless string of my Dad trying to capture me and the monsters at Christmas. it goes from, “oh, okay Dad” to “for the love of everything that’s right and good, END THIS” rather quickly!

    ๐Ÿ™‚ thanks for the FAB card! xoxo

  2. August Avatar
    August

    You ask Niblet to behave for the camera and he suddenly looks like a solemn Bergman child.

    Regglar folk or not, you guys are pretty as peaches.

    Slack muscle flakes? So that’s what I’ve been having for breakfast.

    August

  3. geewits Avatar
    geewits

    I totally get that. Just having TWO people in photos makes it hard for “everyone” to agree on one. Three people in a photo? It’s like saying “Hey Universe! We will never all be smiling at once!” But you guys are all cute anyway.

    As for PP, looking at that picture was kinda odd. I thought about her daughter having been married to freakazoid and then realized they kinda looked alike. Ick.

  4. AmyTree Avatar
    AmyTree

    I dunno, that last one is pretty damn cute! There is a lovely studio portrait somewhere of me and my little brothers, aged like 7, 3 and Too Little to Count. It’s the only one, since Middle Brother took great delight in picking his nose everytime the shutter went…

  5. Casdok Avatar
    Casdok

    LoL!!
    Great photos!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. Glamourpuss Avatar
    Glamourpuss

    What’s that pole growing out of the top of your head, mate? Looks painful.

    Puss

  7. citizen of the world Avatar
    citizen of the world

    Use the last one, it’s fun. We were never able to get all of us looking sane at the same moment.

  8. lime Avatar
    lime

    the best one is the last one, no doubt in my mind!

    oh and the ritual at our house is that once you have posed for the requisite polite and well behaved photos all bets are off and we snap endlessly at the bizarre and rowdy poses. a hundred years from now our descendants will be wondering why great-great grrandma lime seemed so blase and she stood, shrugging while her two daughters pretending to stab and strangle their brother

  9. Bob Avatar
    Bob

    What a great way to start off my Friday – a photo essay!

    I love the last picture, and completely empathize with the rest. I can vaguely remember these attempts. I had hoped to have buried those memories.

  10. Claudia Avatar
    Claudia

    My goodness! What a BEAUTIFUL family you have! And I LOVE the last photo, you’re all just happy and fun and joyful!!! YEAH!!!

  11. Her Grace Avatar
    Her Grace

    You guys are pretty darn cute, but I agree…it’s always easier not to bathe.

  12. Chantal Avatar
    Chantal

    Awe the impossible to attain “perfect picture” which morphs into the “good enough picture” which morphs into the “at least we were all have our eyes open” picture… LOL You guys look great!

  13. furiousBall Avatar
    furiousBall

    you know what would make the best postcard? a series of panels of these shots. seriously. do it.

    no seriously.

    do. it.

  14. Tai Avatar
    Tai

    LOL!
    I NEED a red Niblet tie, that’s fantastic!

    All of you look SO happy, that’s the way a picture should be.

  15. kimber the wolfgrrrl Avatar
    kimber the wolfgrrrl

    Pretenses are highly overrated, and ought always to be dropped. Preferably from a tall height, onto concrete.

    All pictures were nice, but the last one was great!

  16. Anette Avatar
    Anette

    No problem showing those to your great grandparents! Or even your coming great grand children!

  17. Jamie Avatar
    Jamie

    Oh, it is so true! Family photos are so hard, but I love the ones you posted!

    I only have a handful of pictures of the three of us. None of which the little munchkin is smiling.

  18. SQT Avatar
    SQT

    You guys are so cute.

  19. flutter Avatar
    flutter

    Who wantsta be regglar when ya kinbe irrergglar?

    you guys are cute

  20. jen Avatar
    jen

    i adore you.

  21. Claire Avatar
    Claire

    You guys are friggin’ adorable, ‘specially the smallish ones ๐Ÿ˜‰
    I love best the goofy pics of my darlings.

  22. Amy Avatar
    Amy

    I generally find that nudity and stench make for far more interesting pictures.

    But then again, I’ve been blackmailed a time or two.

    Thank god you aren’t of the species who eat their young, because these ones are right cute, I’d say.

    (PS: your comment moderator is using the word fuhket, it makes me love you even more)

  23. heartinsanfrancisco Avatar
    heartinsanfrancisco

    A beautiful family! I guess Mr. Jocelyn was behind the camera, the lucky dog.

    You’re very brave. I don’t do pictures (if I can help it.) And you’re right — Priscilla Presley shouldn’t either anymore.

  24. That Chick Over There Avatar
    That Chick Over There

    I think about 90 percent of my photos with Boy and Girl Child show at least part of my Gene Simmonseque tongue.

    Therefore, I think all of these are awesome.

  25. Diana Avatar
    Diana

    Aw, hell, just plop them in one of those ‘series frames’ and call it ‘us’.

    The last is the bestest.

    That tie says it all.

  26. Princess Pointful Avatar
    Princess Pointful

    I adore the last photo. You all look delightfully happy.

  27. pistols at dawn Avatar
    pistols at dawn

    Clip on ties are still classy, or so I tell myself every day.

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