Wherein Jamie Lynn Spears Breaks My Bank


Every time they want an increase in their allowance, the kids pull this kind of emotional blackmail.

Niblet’s all, “But I’m scawwed at night and need someone to sleep wif me.”

Damn that Zoey 101 episode the kids watched, where the dorm was haunted by a malicious and creeping slimy green mist. Niblet knew there was no way the show-making people could have pretend made that kind of ooze. Clearly, it was real, and, therefore, such a thing could be spritzing around and lurking under his vewwy own bed.

He proved the legitimacy of his fear by waking up, crying, four times the other night, with a final tally of 3 hours of wakefulness between 2 and 5 a.m. (fellow passengers on this tearful journey: long-suffering Ma and Pa). Finally, after a big fight, he gave his pappy a firm embrace in the bed, and they slept in a sweaty headlock until the sun finished rising. During this time, the mother figure crept off to the guest room, where she wound herself in a fleece blanket and a smidgeon of regret that she’d had a second child.

However. The next day, as the parents dipped their heads to the scalp into a steaming pot of coffee,

Girl was all, “Okay, brudder, I’ll sleep with you tonight, so you don’t have to be scared.”

Thus, at 8:30 p.m., the two of them snuggled into his twin bed and slept, without waking, for 11 hours. And again with it tonight.

And now–*dramatic sigh*–since I’m rather a puddle on the floor when faced with their soft, seraphic dewiness, I just might have to up their allowances to one dollar AND twenty-five large American cents per week.

What a couple of manipulators.



By Jocelyn

There's this game put out by the American Girl company called "300 Wishes"--I really like playing it because then I get to marvel, "Wow, it's like I'm a real live American girl who has 300 wishes, and that doesn't suck, especially compared to being a dead one with none."


  1. that’s adorable.

    this might sound weird, but my sister and i (when we lived together) would occassionally sleep in the same bed. it was after a bad break up, or when our grandmother died. very comforting.

  2. Pure emotional blackmail right there. They’re good. You better keep an eye on them.

    I love it when my girls sleep together. It’s so sweet. That is, until about 5 AM and they start kicking each other and fighting in their sleep. In fact, when my three-year-old gets tangled in her blankets (EVERY NIGHT! Girl has a problem), the first name she yells out in anger is her sister’s.

  3. I’ve faced the same issues of lack of sleep with number three. Serious grumpiness and regrets here though as coffee is not liked. The big guys haven’t figured out that some kids get allowance yet, trying to see how long we can get away with it.

  4. Aaah! bless their sweet sleeping faces! I remember we had a few situations like that at our house too! At least you know that you’re manipulated!

  5. OK, you’re going to think I’m a total whackadoo, but I cannot find your email address anywhere! and I know I’ve responded to your comments on my blog before! (yes, I’m aware I’ve lost my mind. I’m looking for it)

    I wanted to thank you for your compliment on my writing. I honestly can’t remember the last time someone gave me a compliment and you have no idea how much it means.

    And as far as needing hours to read my past stuff?? Pfft, girlfriend, I’ve only written about 70 posts, 80% of which are fluff. So I’m thinking, twenty minutes, tops!

    Thanks again. If you have an email you give out (I know some don’t) please send it to me. wellimaginethat@gmail.com

  6. that is too cute. my kids would be up all night chatting and laughing if they slept in the same bed. and we have the same thing, kids scared of things they see on Zoey and Zack and Cody

  7. I commented to this yesterday. In your son’s accent. Now it’s gone and I can’t remember what I said.

    Does this mean we’re finished?

  8. See? This is why I turn to you over and over. I just need Sara to crawl into Colin’s bed instead of ours at 2am. Brilliant.

    Colin is money hungry ever since finding out that Legos don’t grow on trees and Santa won’t be coming for another 3 months. I’m thinking a buck a night is money well spent.

    Although that might backfire and lead him to plant nightmares in her brain from now until he leaves for college in 9 years.

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