Author: Jocelyn

A Time to Every Purpose 17

A Time to Every Purpose

In the last weeks of his life, I would talk to my dad on the phone frequently. He was in Montana. I was in Minnesota. It was January, and at the same time his heart and lungs were deteriorating, my body was busy helping those same organs grow inside the...

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Feel Like Whistling Even With a Shoe Full of Slush 19

Feel Like Whistling Even With a Shoe Full of Slush

Didn’t February last about seventeen weeks? And then Daylight Savings slammed into our bodies–which were already trying to figure out how to get through a day without drooping. What’s more, we’re in the midst of a snowstorm here today, currently racking up 6-10″ new inches on top of the existing...

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My Rider Demands No Brown M & Ms, Imported Versace Towels, and Awesome Entrees 13

My Rider Demands No Brown M & Ms, Imported Versace Towels, and Awesome Entrees

This will be overkill for those of you with whom I’m friended on Facebook. Apologies. Feel free to shift into Long-Suffering Mode here. However, since there are still twelve people on the planet who don’t have Facebook accounts, I thought I’d share one of my recent happinesses here, too. A...

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Do Not Embellish Your Temple 16

Do Not Embellish Your Temple

Apparently, it’s International Women’s Day, which means I should be posting pre-packaged sentiments on Facebook that urge the world to treat dames better. I get that. Let me assure you I am made legitimately irate by the ongoing, centuries-old maltreatment of women. See how I made a sign, even? Feel...

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As God Is My Witness, Each Individual Shall Tote His Own Weary Load 12

As God Is My Witness, Each Individual Shall Tote His Own Weary Load

Behind our house, across the alley, there lives a cohort of quasi-charming renters. Moving in after several disastrous previous occupancies, this group of young men demonstrates that young folk renting a house together don’t have to be feral beasts lacking even the most basic notion of boundaries. I mean, seriously,...

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Hope All Your Tricks Are Good Ones 20

Hope All Your Tricks Are Good Ones

In line with my dislike of holidays and “planned happiness” is my aversion to greeting cards. For me, a pre-packaged sentiment drummed up for pay by someone who hates her job isn’t heartwarming. Nor is the fact that the sender found himself so unable to frame an original thought that...

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Ode an die Freude 13

Ode an die Freude

By the time I finished my first decade of life, I had learned to walk, run, ride a bike; play piano and flute; jeté like a big-boned ballerina possessed; babysit; and play Boggle. Also, I had boobies and was on the cusp of menstruation. By the time I finished my second decade...

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You Asked for It (Well, Two of You Did): How to Achieve a Style Equaled Only By Its Substance 16

You Asked for It (Well, Two of You Did): How to Achieve a Style Equaled Only By Its Substance

Women too often lead with apology. I have vowed to break that culturally inculcated habit and not apologize for my behaviors unless I’ve just vomited in your daisies or hit the reset button on your Furby. Thus, I will not lead with apology here. Instead, I will celebrate my inner...

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Over the River and Through the Tunnel 17

Over the River and Through the Tunnel

We aren’t fans of resolutions around here, nor are we particularly go-getters. However, as it turns out, we each have something we’d like to achieve in 2013. Allegra’s goal for this year is to learn to skate ski. We got her outfitted with rental equipment yesterday; she’ll use it the...

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A Night Like Any Other 11

A Night Like Any Other

In 2000, when our first child was born, my dad bought us a video camera to aid in documenting the special moments. Although YouTube and America’s Funniest Home Videos intimate otherwise, video cameras are rarely present during the truly special moments. It was extremely lovely, however, to be able to point...

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