Despite the Vomit, Why We Don’t Send the Lad to Be Fostered at the Nearest Castle

“Despite the Vomit, Why We Don’t Send the Lad to Be Fostered at the Nearest Castle” He could end up a page to some dashing knight if we did, you know. And he’d learn the ins and outs of keeping chain mail rust free, which is a skill I’d like at least one member of […]

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Meme-ries

“Meme-ries” Dorky Dad did it. I’m pointing a finger, and it’s not my pointer finger. At any rate, I jump here, in this post, fully into the life and times of Blogville. Make me mayor for a day, woncha? City keys and all? So, yes, I’ve been tagged with a meme. And even though these […]

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Vomithounds: You Better Be Good, or You’ll Be Gone

“Vomithounds: You Better Be Good, or You’ll Be Gone” (methinks this gel has a vomit habit)* Earlier this week, Girl was suffering from an undiagnosed Fever ‘N Ague. We knew she had a high temperature. We could see her glassy eyes and flushed cheeks from our vantage point across the room, safely out of germ-jumping […]

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Bite Me

“Bite Me” This much is a given: I need to lower my body into a large vat of rubbing alchohol and remain suspended there for some minutes. What has not yet been decided are the logistics of the lowering. Obviously, I need some sort of harness, right? And while I suppose a bathtub could suffice […]

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Stop Trying to Chop Off Your Sister’s Head with Your New Toy Axe While She’s Vomiting onto the Floor of the Shuttle

So we did it. Guatemala hosted us well and remains intact, despite our tear across its kidneys. All in all, I’d say we had a near-perfect two weeks there, particularly considering our respective ages, the ever-present noise of cars, birds, firecrackers, and drunken revellers, and the kids’ certainty that they would never, ever eat a […]

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More Centrally American

“More Centrally American” This may be my last post for a couple of weeks, for Groom and I, some months back, bolstered by a few shots of whiskey slammed down during a State of the Union address (by the end, we were channeling David Byrne, chopping on our arms, and slurring, “This is not our […]

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The Best You Can Hope for in the Hoosegow is a Sealy Posturpedic

“The Best You Can Hope for in the Hoosegow is a Sealy Posturpedic” Consider this story of misdirected holiday hopes, broadcast last week on NPR: Richard Perez of Lake Station, Indiana, wanted to impress his beloved wife by giving her a plasma television this Christmas. The rub was that he didn’t actually feel compelled to […]

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