O Mighty Crisis Stories

43

“Happy Bir– Oh, Hell, Whatever” (photo: http://www.flickr.com/photos/38626538@N00/401568720/) I’m turning forty on Sunday. My dad would have been seventy-two that same day, had he not passed away four years ago. Suddenly, four years ago, I stopped enjoying a shared birthday and now face a lifetime of solo celebration. Since 2003, even...

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16

“A Pimped-Up Paddy’s Day” (thanks, Paintergirl, for the pikipimp hook-up!) I’m an Irisher by heritage (that, combined with being a quarter Finnish, makes me strangely silent yet talkative, somber yet jovial, staid yet merry), so in honor of yet another mass-media-manufactured holiday, St. Patrick’s Day, I’m resurrecting a post containing...

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19

“Paradise White” Look at them, those long, white, snowy lines of powder. I spent all last weekend snorting them up. It was quite a binge. Two weeks ago, I was jonesing for snow. But then I pawned my fishtank, sold some plasma, and scrounged for loose change in the sofa...

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Get Off Your Knees, Stop Clasping Your Hands, and Read Some Aristotle, Ya Knucklesuckers 30

Get Off Your Knees, Stop Clasping Your Hands, and Read Some Aristotle, Ya Knucklesuckers

“Get Off Your Knees, Stop Clasping Your Hands, and Read Some Aristotle, Ya Knucklesuckers” I am an English teacher, so I get to be crabby. That, along with wearing intimidating glasses, is part of my job. What’s more, it’s not enough just to be crusty; fundamental to the profile of...

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Doctor, Lawyer, Indian Chief? 32

Doctor, Lawyer, Indian Chief?

At loose ends this morning, Wee Niblet queried, “Dad, can we go down in the basement and find stuff we’re not using and tape it together?” Hoppin’ sassafras, but that’s my kind of question. After some basement diving and an hour of various tapings, the result was this: Even more...

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My Fantasy Island: Herve Villachez Is to Ricardo Montalban As…a Hawaii Getaway Is to My Snowy Weekend in Duluth 26

My Fantasy Island: Herve Villachez Is to Ricardo Montalban As…a Hawaii Getaway Is to My Snowy Weekend in Duluth

“My Fantasy Island: Herve Villachez Is to Ricardo Montalban As…a Hawaii Getaway Is to My Snowy Weekend in Duluth” Some folks might argue that I am prone to excess. For example, I have been known to have more than 60 pairs of shoes loitering in my closet, mingling and sweating...

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21

“Our House: In the Middle of the Week” According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, “shelter” could fall somewhere between being a physiological and a safety need. What I know is I like all kinds of shelter– from a bivy sackto a Quinzee hut to an RV to a little white...

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17

“Birkebeiner, Redux” Tomorrow, North America’s largest cross-country ski race, The American Birkebeiner, will be held, despite–as I may have mentioned once or twice–a general lack of snow in the region. Race organizers have abbreviated the course, and only the elite athletes will actually be skiing a competitive, timed race, but,...

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Cooling Our Jets 21

Cooling Our Jets

“Cooling Our Jets” In my last post, I pretty much took the piss out of winter–and February especially. Time for true confessions: I actually adore winter. It is one of my three favorite seasons, in fact. And when a winter overflows with snow, it makes the cut for Top Two....

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Yo, Brad Pitt: I’ve Got Your Arts & Crafts House Right Here 17

Yo, Brad Pitt: I’ve Got Your Arts & Crafts House Right Here

“Yo, Brad Pitt: I’ve Got Your Arts & Crafts House Right Here” We in Northern Minnesota are most definitely riding the hump of winter, one with particularly cold temps and very little snow. It’s been dark for some months now, here on the pack ice, the sled dogs have been...

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